Even though I was awarded the title of "Best Dressed" during my senior year of high school, I would want to take this opportunity to offer some advice to sports fans who are in desperate need of some aid. Although I may not be a fashion expert per se, I did win the award for "Best Dressed."
When I say "those who struggle to choose the appropriate jersey or accessories to wear at a game," I'm not referring to people who simply tuck in their jerseys, even if that's a poor look in and of itself; rather, I'm talking about people who struggle to find the right jersey or accessories to wear.
In lieu of providing an official tutorial on how to tie a bow tie — partly because I still haven't perfected it myself — here are other items that no sports fan should ever be seen wearing while attending an event of any kind.
15. A Suit
I understand. You're coming straight from the office, and you didn't have time to change before the game since you couldn't get back home.
You need to anticipate ahead of time and make preparations for events like these in order to accomplish the vast majority of the tasks that are included on this list.
Why would anyone want to be the uncomfortable man who has to sit in a crowded space, worry about where to put their blazer, and eat wings as they do it?
You shouldn't want that, therefore you might want to think about taking a change of clothes to work the next time you go, seeing as how not even Jack Nicholson can pull off wearing a suit to a game.
14. Having absolutely nothing on your body
There have been a few spectators who have achieved renown for their streaking antics, but it is strongly recommended that you do not follow in their footsteps.
When you're drinking in the parking lot with your friends and debating the concept of being nude or almost nude, it could seem like a funny and liberating idea to be completely naked or nearly naked. However, put yourself in the position of the person who is sitting next to the person who isn't wearing any clothes; do you now see why this isn't a good idea?
13. An Effortless and Complete Attire
You are more than welcome to don the shirt of your team or put on the same shorts that they wear on the court; however, you should try to avoid wearing both of these items at the same time.
Fans at football games have been known to wear full padding while sitting in the stands, in contrast to the odd sight of someone attending a basketball game wearing nothing but a jersey and shorts due to the fact that it is currently winter.
Keep in mind that the reason you are there is to cheer on your side, and not in the hopes of being confused for a player and being thrust into the action of the game.
12. A bodysuit made of spandex
I am aware that the show It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia was responsible for the rise in popularity of these bodysuits, and that Vancouver Canucks fans Adam Forsyth and Ryan Sullivan were the ones who took it to the next level; but, I believe that it's time to tone it down a bit.
I am only pointing out that it is a fad that has been done to death, since there are numerous pairs of males attending every conceivable sporting event dressed in their own version of the clothing.
Let's reserve spandex for the elderly females at the gym, regardless of whether it's pink, green, or any other color.
11. Optical Gear
During post-game interviews in recent years, it has become increasingly common for NBA players and other professional athletes to wear spectacles that are reminiscent of the style worn by Steve Urkel.
It seems that the vast majority of gamers who still wear them have grown tired of this fad, therefore it would be wise for you to avoid participating in it if at all possible.
Spectator sporting events are not the place to show off your slick sense of style and sophistication; instead, ditch the shades and go for a more laid-back look.
10. Rain Gear with Your Team's Logo Stuck outside in the rain?
It is your fault if you did not come prepared because you failed to check the weather report before you arrived.
You could choose to enjoy the game from the comfort of an indoor stadium bar rather than purchasing a plastic poncho with your team's logo to cover your clothes and expose yourself to the elements. This would be a better option for you than exposing yourself to the elements.
These ponchos not only have an unpleasant appearance, but they will also cost you approximately $12, which is money that would be better spent on refreshments.
9. Incorrect Athletic T-Shirts and Jerseys
When going to a baseball game, you shouldn't wear a jersey from another sport, like basketball or football. This theory is applicable to all different types of sports.
Do not be the eccentric that wears a jersey of one sports team displaying the name of a player who plays a completely other sport on the back, such as a Tim Tebow Colorado Rockies jersey. Instead, wear a jersey of a team that plays the sport that you are most familiar with.
8. Giant Hats Shaped Like Tennis Balls
There are a lot of sophisticated tennis fans who would rather not wear a huge felt ball on their head while watching a match and would rather wear something else instead.
Nevertheless, for some inexplicable reason, these fans thought it was a good idea to go outside while they were wearing them.
7. Team Jerseys with Misspelled Names
How is it possible for this person to not have seen the mistake that was made in the jersey that they put on?
How could he, claiming to be a fan of the New York Knicks, not only buy a jersey with the wrong spelling of Walt Frazier's name on it but also have the nerve to wear it in public?
I'd like to compliment him on his apathy, but I can't in good conscience condone the level of recklessness he's displaying here.
6. Novelty Hair Visors
Do you find it hard to believe that every single NFL team has their own unique take on this strange item of headwear?
What really is going on in this world?
Visors ought to be reserved in most circumstances for only two individuals: Steve Spurrier and Phil Mickelson. For everyone else, visors are a fashion no-no, especially when paired with synthetic "flair hair" that is stitched into them. This makes them quite likely one of the most cringe-inducing sports accessories that have ever been created.
5. The Jerseys That Have Two Sides
It is unknown when these first became popular, but I definitely remember seeing one for the first time in 2007 during the Ohio State vs. Notre Dame game that was played in the Fiesta Bowl.
This was the moment when Brady Quinn's sister donned one to show her support for both her younger brother and her future spouse, former Buckeyes linebacker A.J. Hawk, by separating the shirts down the middle. She did this by wearing one of each player's jersey.
Since that time, numerous designs have appeared, with the jersey worn by Peyton Manning while he played for the Indianapolis Colts and the Denver Broncos being one of the most in-demand items in recent years.
4. Signed Jerseys
So, you were able to convince your favorite athlete to sign the authentic jersey that you purchased for $250, and he or she did it?
I understand the excitement that comes with having a player sign your jersey, but rather than being that person who parades it about at a sporting event, why don't you get it framed and hang it on your wall so you can appreciate it even more?
You might be able to find a previously worn replica jersey of the one you want at a thrift store to use as a stand-in for when you go to games.
3. Jerseys for the opposing team in the match
There is absolutely no shame in supporting your favorite team by traveling to an away game and cheering them on. In point of fact, I consider it to be an essential component of bragging about the level of dedication you have as a fan.
However, make sure to keep a low profile about it.
If you're among your fellow fans at your home field, acting like an annoying drunk fan could be funny or even okay, but if you go to another person's field, you're just asking for unexpected trouble.
2. Sweatbands (Only for People Who Are Authorized to Drive)
I'm willing to be accommodating, and I'll let any young person up to the point where they are in their second year of high school wear this style out in public.
Having fun is important to children, and they like receiving free stuff.
But what about a grownup who tries to wrap a sweatband around their head or wrap it around their forearms? That cannot be done. You are not a member of a dancing group, therefore you don't need to bother yourself with those extra accoutrements.
1. Gym or running suits
Even in public, tracksuits should never be considered appropriate wear, much less when attending a sporting event.
My heart truly goes out to you if you are the type of person who takes pleasure in the feeling and sound of low-quality nylon rubbing against your legs with each step that you take.
The athletes should be allowed to keep the warm-up clothes, but the rest of their attire should be more standard, such as khakis and a t-shirt.
